I woke from terrible dreams of readers chasing me with pitchforks and torches, in the worst kind of censorship as they burned books they believed unworthy, and banned freedom to share writing with the masses. This included digital books, fanfic, and cell phone novels. I just wanted to curl deeper into my covers and sleep away the terrible dreams. I really didn’t want to get out of bed this morning, but I did.
My wonderful husband was still home, getting ready for work, and I wanted to tell him what happened last night. Except he would never understand the roll of emotions inside me. He would never understand how the opinion of readers that weren’t even mine could leave me feeling sad, angry, and hurt. Hell, I don’t even understand it.
They weren’t attacking me personally. They were attacking self-publishing as a whole. And the dumb part is one woman claimed to never read self-published authors but only the classics. Is she even aware at how many of those classics are self-published? And how many were picked up by publishers after the author was dead and buried? Probably not.
It more then that though. They were attacking the hard work of authors that just want their story heard. They were attacking the sterotypes that have been placed on authors that have decided to go it alone. They were attacking our freedom of speech, wanting to censor who has the right to publish a book. As if it was their God given right.
It wasn’t personal, but it was personal. Yeah, I know I’m contradicting myself. It wasn’t my work on display being ridiculed, but it could have been.
Is my work above being laughed at? Not in a million years. I’ve found mistake in it. I correct it as I find it. Is it my best work? To date, yes. Will I continue to improve? Of course. Will I let others get me down? Never.
I’ll continue upon the course I set for myself and my writing back in January 2010 when I decided to forgo publishing with a publishing house for self-publishing, or indie publishing. It is a plan that fits who I am and my lifestyle. Publishing through a publishing house wouldn’t work for me. I prefer to be my own boss. I prefer to be in control. I prefer to have the freedom only self-publishing can give me.
So it’s time to get out the armor, strap on the kantana, the guns, the knives, maybe a gernade or two and face the world well armed. I’m tired of being meek and mild. I’m tired of hiding. It’s time to defend myself and fight back.